Things I Wish I'd Known At 30

Have you ever considered how different your life might have been had you known things when you were younger that you know now?

My wife Annette and I have both been contemplating this recently and we thought it would make for an interesting topic for a blog post. We settled on the age of 30, since the transition from our twenties into our thirties is such a pivotal period.. Imagine my surprise when, in the course of writing this, I came across an article in The Guardian asking a group of influential women the very same question. Uncannily, some of the comments and views expressed matched my own thoughts almost to the letter. It got me thinking - perhaps that we’re more connected than we realise? I'd like to believe so. Or maybe it’s just coincidence. I'll let you decide.

“Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.”

~ Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama ~

So when I recently asked myself the question “What do I know now that I wish I'd known at 30?”, I decided I would not allow my ponderings to be tinged with any sense of regret. I can't turn back the clock, so I resolved instead to be grateful for the knowledge I have acquired and to hopefully put it to good use. And it's worth bearing in mind that sometimes, the setbacks we experience in life may actually work in our favour in ways we never would have imagined.

We, all of us, are on an arc of personal evolution. Wisdom can’t

 be rushed.The only goal we can strive for is to eventually arrive at becoming

 the person we can admire.

~ Diana Nyad, American Long Distance Swimmer ~

We are what we eat

I wish I'd known that removing meat, dairy, and refined carbohydrates from my diet, and choosing instead to eat wholefoods that grow in the ground or on trees, would have such a dramatic effect on my health. Why did it only become evident in my 5th decade of life that eating this way would be in my best interest, helping me to lose the excess weight I'd carried since the age of 10? It’s difficult for me to underplay the positive effect that losing weight had on my physical health and my self-confidence.The doctors didn’t provide me with the solution. The only thing they told me was that I was overweight but not how best to go about resolving it. They didn’t provide me with a detailed dietary plan or recommendations as to what to eat and what not to eat, other than simply to ‘cut down’. The reason for this is quite simple. Doctors do not have a detailed knowledge of nutrition, since it barely features in the medical curriculum, and in many cases what they learned is either outdated or forgotten.

Thanks to a diet industry that thrives on failure, the quick and short-term fixes on offer almost never result in permanent healthy weight loss. I tried a number of the diets that were in vogue at the time. Atkins, Low Fat, you name it. Nothing worked for more than a few months, even weeks, because eating according to a strict and unsatisfying regimen is impossible to sustain over the longer term. To lose weight and maintain a healthy weight, the foods we eat need to be pleasurable if they are to become our new normal. Most weight-loss diets don't qualify because they're based on prohibition. They make us miserable and we long to eat foods that are satisfying to us. .

Fortunately for me, the switch to a plant-based diet opened up a hitherto unknown realm, where the foods were, and continue to be, both pleasurable and satisfying. The physical and mental transformation I underwent was to become the catalyst for a complete change of direction, leading me to leave my corporate job to become a health coach. Coupled with the loving support of my wife Annette, I know for sure this would never have happened if I hadn't experienced this shift. 

The importance of good breathing 

I wish I'd appreciated the value of correct breathing sooner. Until a few years ago, I was not aware how vital diaphragmatic and slow breathing is for good posture, for focusing and calming the mind, and for our physical wellbeing. I’m a typical type A personality and my meticulous tendencies and drive for perfectionism have sometimes worked against me, and no more so than in my twenties and thirties, at a key stage in my career. The stress I suffered at work led to regular bouts of anxiety and occasional panic attacks. Stress is now recognised to be a component in most of the chronic conditions we see today. In my case, it was a cause of frequent digestive issues and back problems. In 1996, at the age of 33, things came to a head when I suffered a prolapsed disc in my lower back. The memory of being carried from my car in a hotel car park in Northern Germany to my room and then being admitted to hospital for surgery is not one I look back on fondly. There’s a good chance that had I known then how to use breathing as a way to reduce tension and to calm the mind, I’m convinced I would not have suffered the degree of anxiety and fear I had then, let alone the need for back surgery.

It’s hardly a surprise, then, that the two main things I’d wish I’d known at age 30 are very much linked to what I do now. As a Breathing Re-education Coach and Plantbased Nutrition Educator, I am now able to help others to reap the same benefits that I have enjoyed for myself. I had no inkling 30 ago that I would be doing what I do now. 

Je ne regrette rien….

~ Graham Henry